Path to Parenthood: Options for LGBTQ Family Building

Growing up, many of us had dreams of what our future was going to hold. For some of us it was going to college and getting the career you worked so hard for, and for others it was to build the family we had always dreamed of. Neither is always as easy as we had hoped. Whether you are suffering from infertility or you happen to not have the right pieces, there are options to help you. The question asked most often when infertility options come up is adoption or biological. 

With today’s technology, having a child or children that are biologically yours is possible. Surrogacy is one way for a same-sex couples to have that child that is biologically related to one of them if that is what they desire. 

There are two types of surrogates. If you are using a traditional surrogate, she with either have artificial insemination with the intended father’s sperm or a donor sperm or she will have an embryo transfer after IVF using her egg and either the intended father’s sperm or a sperm donor. With a gestational surrogate, eggs from an intended mother or an egg donor and sperm from the intended father or a sperm donor will be needed. Embryos will then be fertilized via IVF and put into the surrogate via embryo transfer. Donor embryos can also be used. New Mexico Surrogacy only handles gestational surrogacy.

Some male same-sex couples will create embryos from both of their sperm using the same egg donor, so they can have more than one child, each father biologically related to one of the children and the children also biologically related through the egg. Some female same-sex couples will use the same sperm donor to fertilize eggs from both. Female same-sex couples also use surrogacy, it’s just less common. 

Female same-sex couples can also grow their family through artificial insemination. They can either use sperm of someone they know that’s willing to donate to them or they can contact a sperm donation center to pick a donor that they feel is a good fit for their family (Always make sure a legal agreement is in place, and an attorney that specializes in assisted reproductive technology is consulted, no matter what route you choose!). Another option to grow their family is through IVF. Some couples decide for various reasons to retrieve eggs from one of the intended mothers and have the other carry. This could be done for medical reasons or just because one is a better carrying choice and one is a better egg choice or because they both want a connection to the gestation!

Some same-sex couples can also grow their families through adoption.  According to the Adoption Network “of the 400,000 children in foster care in the U.S 114,556 cannot be returned to their families and are waiting to be adopted.” Adoption is a great option to give a child a family, but it is no longer the only way. If you are interested in the surrogacy process, New Mexico Surrogacy is here to answer any questions you may have.


Interested in growing your family via gestational surrogacy?