Photos During The Surrogacy Process
Pregnancy is an amazing time! Seeing your little one grow is unbelievable, and most people want to document it, especially when you’ve been waiting for so long to be on this journey! But how do you approach this intimate subject with your surrogate? Here are some things to think about when getting those maternity shoots going!
Ask early: We probably sound like a broken record with this one, but asking early with everything is always best. Why? Because if something is really important to you, you’ll want to make sure you’re on the same page to ensure the best match possible. If getting photos during the pregnancy is a non-negotiable, you don’t want to be matched with a surrogate who is very private and does not wish to have any photos taken. Generally, surrogates are more than happy to participate in photos, especially if the intention is to keep them private and not on social media, but it’s always best to ask early.
Styles and Timelines: Do you want photos every month or just once during the pregnancy? Do you want to be included in the photos? What about the surrogate’s family members? Do you have a vision in mind of the style of photos you’d like? These are all things to think about!
Photographers: It’s always good to research photographers in the area prior to booking one. Check out their work online of other maternity shoots. Is it the vision you had in mind? Do they have good reviews? Online surrogacy boards and communities are a great place to find recommendations. Have they done a surrogacy pregnancy before? If so, they might have some great ideas that you may not have thought about and will be more sensitive and understanding. If you’re trying to keep costs down, perhaps you have a friend or family member who could help out. You may also just want to ask the surrogate (or her partner) to make monthly pictures so you can have a record of your baby growing!
Props: One quick search on Pinterest will bring up thousands of ideas of adorable surrogate maternity photo ideas including props that you may not have thought of. There are chalkboard props, clever positioning, t-shirts, ultrasounds and holding bellies and hands. Think about your personality and how you’d like your photos to be.
Run your plan past your surrogate: No matter what you decide, it’s always best to run your plan past your surrogate. Even if she’s totally game for whatever you want, make sure you share the plan (or even brainstorm with her) when you decide what you decide to do.
Delivery room photos: Maternity shots are one thing but delivery room photos can be a completely different category. This is important to discuss separately. Discuss your vision with your surrogate (and your photographer if your surrogate is okay with doing them). The surrogate will more than likely be open to photos, but she may have some limitations on what can be included and what can’t for modesty’s sake. Communication is key!
Social media sharing: In today’s social world, this is a hot topic. Even if your surrogate is cool with photos, she may not want some photos available for the world to see. Specifically, some delivery room shots. It’s an intimate moment and some photos may make her feel uncomfortable to have out on the internet. Be sure to discuss which photos are okay to share and which ones she’d rather you keep for your own memories only.
This is truly a magical time for you, and it’s perfectly normal to want to want to capture every moment. Your surrogate will most likely want to include you in every part of the process…just make sure everyone is on the same page. Get your tears ready for the process. You’re about to go through an amazing journey!